Oyasumi
by Lila Priceless
Summary: Ayame gets more than he expects when he spends the night in Kyo's room.


Ayame knew he was taking a risk when he opened the door to Kyo's room. He couldn't spend another sleepless night with Shigure and Yuki had locked his door. In spite of his lecherous teasing, he knew that sleeping in Honda Tohru's room would be inappropriate so that left only one place to lay his head. After quietly closing the door he took a moment to let his eyes adjust to the dim moonlight before padding his way to the futon.

"This is strange. Kyon-kichi is such a light sleeper. I was sure I would wake him," Ayame thought as he pulled back the covers before sliding beneath them.

"I guess this is my lucky night. He hasn't moved an inch. Maybe he overdid his afternoon training sessions. Oh well, it's my gain," he thought settling his head on the pillow.

The early fog of sleep had begun to cloud Ayame's brain when a jerky movement from the other side of the bed disturbed him. He lay still in horror, ignoring the motions and grunts in hopes that Kyo would once more settle down so he could finally get to sleep. He was beginning to think that maybe sharing a room with Shigure might be better than sharing one with a teenage boy with an obvious crush on his housemate.

"No"

"Stop"

"Please stop"

"It's not my fault" Kyo rasped as his body began to spasm more wildly.

"Please don't leave"

"I'll be a good boy I promise"

"Don't leave, please don't leave"

Ayame rolled over and placed an arm on Kyo's shoulder. He now recognized the motions and grunts as those of someone who was in the throes of a nightmare and not a solitary moment of self-induced ecstasy. He slowly began to shake him, "Wake up, Kyo. Wake up. You're having a bad dream. Wake up."

"Kyo, wake up" Ayame said shaking more forcefully as he hovered over Kyo's trembling body, "Dammit, wake up."

"Shit!" Ayame cursed once he realized his efforts were having no effect as the moonlight exposed the tears sliding freely from Kyo's closed eyes.

Ayame sighed as he sat up and pulled Kyo into his lap and begun to stroke his hair and rub his back hoping to bring some comfort to the sleeping child. All of the Jyuunishi suffered from some form of nightmares on a regular basis and he was no exception. He shook his head in pity as he narrowed the cause down to the source of 90 percent of those nightmares - parents or Akito.

"It's sad isn't it, Kyo" Ayame whispered as he rocked him back and forth like a baby, "those that are supposed to love us and care for us cause us this much pain."

"Which is it tonight?" He asked the whimpering child asleep in his arms, "I guess that's why I was able to slip in so uneventfully. There truly is no such thing as rest for the wicked or a free bed"

Ayame hated nights like this. They made him realize how much of a failure he truly was as a big brother and how terrible a person he had been. He'd heard Yuki's screams on the rare nights he'd slept at home and ignored them figuring if he had to deal with his demons on his own, so should Yuki. Many times he'd seen Hatori attempt to drive away the nightmares of Momiji or any other sleeping relative in his sight, but he did nothing but watch in amusement at the length Hatori would go to ease their troubled minds. He remembered the cold fury in his idol's eyes the one time he did question his actions.

"_What's the point? They have to learn to deal with it sooner or later like we did."_

"_Can you really deal with it Ayame? Have you really learned to deal with it? Have any of us learned to deal with it?" Hatori barked referencing the true reason behind Shigure's erratic sleep patterns. _

It was something he would never forget as it was one of the few times that the quiet unflappable Hatori had lost his cool. His tone and expression were evidence to the fact that he too did not have control of his nightmares and that he undoubtedly saw through Ayame's lie of controlling his.

It was only after waking one afternoon with his head cradled protectively in Mine's lap did Ayame finally understand and appreciate the intent behind Hatori's actions and words.

"_Please forgive me if I did anything inappropriate, sir. You seemed to be having a nightmare. We've been so busy that I didn't want to wake you, but I didn't know what else to do…"_

His shop had only been open for 6 months so he and his new assistant had been working like dogs and barely doing enough business to keep food on their tables. It was from sheer exhaustion that he did something so careless as falling asleep on the storeroom floor.

The dream was the same one that has haunted him since childhood, but updated to include his current fears:

_The indifference in his mother's voice as she tells him he's worthless. He always has been worthless and he always will be worthless. Everything he touches turns to dust and what makes him think this will be any different? The hatred in her eyes as she states that he truly is a worthless fool. He came into this world ruining people lives and dragging them down and he will continue to do so. It won't take long before that pretty little assistant is a blind wrinkled crone and as useless as he is and that the abomination he calls a business falls down into a worthless heap of ruins. The sharpness of her finger as it points at him and instructs him to do everyone a favor and to just disappear. The swish of her skirt as she turns sharply blowing away tiny bits of his body as he truly does crumble to dust and begin to disappear._

Ayame remembers looking into eyes that were shadowed by as many sleepless nights as his own and seeing concern. The warmth of her lap cushioning his head was the softest thing he'd ever felt. Mine's presence did nothing to drive away the nightmare or the inner fear that he might actually be worthless, but somehow it helped knowing that someone cared enough to stay by him and see him through the darkness. It helped to know that someone cared enough to reach out and touch them lovingly and make sure that he would be alright.

This simple gesture meant the world to someone whose entire existence is destined to rob them of physical affection. A touch without fear, malice, or degradation was something they rarely experienced, but craved so desperately. He never made fun of Hatori cradling a sleep tortured relative again and he soon began to do the same.

"That's better" he whispered stroking Kyo's hair as his breath began to stabilize and his thrashing slowed to a minimum. "For a minute I thought you'd be as bad as Hiro when Kisa was hospitalized. The magnificent Madubachi Trio working in shifts did nothing to calm him down. The sedative had no effect other than make it harder to reach him. Even Kureno slipped away when he could to help. It is a good thing Satsuki-chan likes sheep or else he might have gone crazy."

Ayame continued to cradle Kyo after the nightmare subsided. It was rare for any Jyuunishi to be held, especially the cat and Ayame also wanted to savor the moment a while longer. It was easy to pretend that this was his brother in his arms. He'd never once given Yuki a real hug and he imagined it would be something like this. Yuki and Kyo were similar in size and height so it wouldn't hurt to pretend and practice for that much anticipated day.

Ayame yawned as he slowly slid Kyo out of his lap and placed his head back on his pillow, "Good night, Kyon-kichi. Please don't disturb me anymore."

Once again Ayame returned to his side of the futon and drifted off to a surprisingly pleasant sleep.

Author's Notes: Oyasumi roughly translated means "Good night"

Thank you to Lunaticneko and Boopy1014 for beta-reading.


End file.
